Romanticizing the American Dream

My response to an honest question.

Social Thoughts

7 minutes

I responded to a Redditor who asked, “Do you think Filipinos still romanticize America?” I’ll quote their opening post:

This is a genuine question of mine and no hate to Americans. Just the government, health care, economy and gun laws. Same as how foreigners were scared to come here during Duterte’s term. That’s a valid reason. Anyway, when I was a kid, I hear family members be so proud of another relative for being able to live in the US. But now, it looks like no one wants to move there even if they’re professionals and have the means to. I’m not quite sure tho. Maybe that’s just in my family. It looks like the American dream doesn’t exist anymore. If u ask people nowadays where they wanna move to they would say Canada, UK, France. Anywhere in the world except US. And to be honest, that’s my answer too. It started during the pandemic where a lot of asian people were attacked, plus i heard from an American friend that when someone is injured or something, they would rather take a cab instead of the ambulance because that’s too expensive. Like wtf? Also school shootings, there are crazy violent people everywhere regardless of the country that’s why not everyone can have a gun but in the US it looks like it’s very easy to aquire one. I know US is a first world country and most filipinos move there for better pay and opportunities. The thing is rent is very expensive there. You will get paid in dollars and higher than what you earn here in ph, but the cost of living there is also very high. Most of your money will go to food, rent, bills (just necessities). Vacation? Forget about it. But here in ph you can go on vacation with the little money you have. There are nearby beaches 3-4 hours away from manila. The tipping culture too, it’s crazy. Lastly, unhealthy food there is cheaper than healthy food. So poor people tend to become obese. With that being said, I don’t romanticize the US anymore. But do you think most filipinos still have the American dream?

I was initially hesitant to respond, but thought about how difficult it was for me to reconcile being both American and Filipino back in my younger years. Eventually, I posted this reply, copied below:


TL;DR: I did what I mostly do on Reddit and typed out the following and initially thought, nevermind, nobody cares enough to read this and I don’t really care enough to finish anyway, but figured it might be useful to add to the discussion an actual success story in the making.

Be warned that the following is a very personal anecdote and will be fraught with generalizations and conclusions drawn from one individual’s unique experiences. Your mileage, on this earth and in this life, may vary.

Inb4 sanaol.


Just moved to the US last August. In my 20+years as an employee in the Philippines, my highest salary was ₱22k. More than 50% of my PHP salary went to rent, followed by utilities (Internet partially subsidized by work at my last job), then groceries. I needed to maintain my gigs/sideline work in order to have anything left over for fun/savings, which I’ve been able to do naman; I don’t tend to sit idle.

My first job here in California pays monthly what I would earn in the Philippines over half a year. My rent has risen significantly too, but with all things accounted for, I can save significantly more living the same lifestyle here as how I lived in Manila. In fact, I have more spending money now and can easily upgrade my PC if I wanted to (whereas back in Manila, it would be a very serious decision to do so). I can eat more than 3 meals a day, if I wanted to, because contrary to popular belief, food here is cheap and plentiful if you’re able to buy groceries and meal prep for yourself. Yes of course fast food and restaurants are more expensive; you pay for rent and salary and brand name when you eat out, it’s no different anywhere else, but my grocery bill here vs in Manila? Same, and I get bigger portions.

My job, which pays me well, treats me well too. I’ve been able to fly back to visit my family in Manila three times since my initial migration. That’s three round-trip airline tickets. It took a huge chunk of my PHP savings just to buy that first one-way ticket out of Manila. Now it feels like if I wanted to I could just get on a plane to anywhere. The work policy at my company isn’t just “work from home,” it’s “work from anywhere.” As long as I get my job done, they don’t mind where I do it from. Full benefits, too. I’ve never seen that kind of respect for an employee and work/life balance from any company I worked for in the Philippines.

Never personally experienced racism here. Almost all my work colleagues are white, we get along perfectly fine in and out of the workplace. Same situation with my Caucasian neighbors. Most of my interactions with people in general here are with minorities though, interestingly enough. Funny observation: every time I’ve passed through immigration at the airports, my security check was done by Latinos or African Americans, and they’ve always been pleasant and said “welcome home” every single time. At NAIA I’d be lucky to even be spoken to by the immigration agent. US passport holder (dual citizen with ACR) here though, not sure if the Philippine passport holders get treated any better.

In fact, I’d say that as far as I can remember, the only times I’ve ever been treated unfairly in my life was in the Philippines (and maybe that one time in France too). I don’t know if it’s because of how I look, or how I sound, but save for a few close friends, Filipinos have never really accepted me into the flock. My blood is 100% Pinoy, mom and dad were both born in Manila, I speak both English and Filipino (one of them better than the other, guess which), I lived in the Philippines for longer than most r/phr4r Redditors were alive I bet, and yet I’m the one being looked at as the other. In general, my personal experience with humans during my short life on this planet has shown me that Filipinos are more likely to draw assumptions based on external appearances than Americans.

I do realize my current situation in America, with regards to work at least, is not the norm. Many companies are still stuck in the past, with a corporate/capitalist mindset that treats their employees more akin to slaves than actual people. However, I can honestly say that it’s not that much different in the Philippines when it comes to corporate work. Imagine, if you’re a company owner you can buy 1/3 of a human being’s daily life (1/2 if you account for the fact that most people need to sleep) for only ₱22k/mo. (even less in most cases), and you don’t even have to feed or clothe or shelter them? Sure, you have to ensure they pay their taxes and social security, but that can just come out of their paycheck. And since I’m a generous company owner, I can throw them some rice allowance, to show I’m not a complete monster. Oh but they want to take a leave to mourn their deceased relative? Sorry, that’ll cost a day’s wages. I’m not kidding when I say that sometimes I used to see people walking their dogs in BGC/Ortigas and felt like those pets lived a more pampered life than what I could offer my own children.

So the original question was, “do you think most Filipinos still have the American dream?” Well, if the dream is still that age-old idea that one could move to America on a wish and a prayer and have an equal shot at achieving success and prosperity through sheer fucking will and hard work, then I bet much doubt anyone, Filipino or not, truly believes that. The world has changed too much since 1931, when “the American dream” was first coined as such. There is a generational and societal malaise that has jaded much of the thinking population which prevents them from feeling such hope, whether to shield themselves from disappointment or to resolve the cognitive dissonance that occurs when they see it being realized by others. So no, I don’t think Filipinos or people in general still dream that dream. But I think it can still happen, and while I’m not yet quite living proof of it, I’m working towards making it my reality.

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